Friday, October 21, 2011

Occupytopus - Occupy Wall Street...Everywhere

So, after a couple of weeks - Sept 17 it began - the Occupy Wall Street is spreading....everywhere.  It's here in SF, although a bit weak (we're kind of to be assumed as having agreed already - we're somewhat on board), and I just looked online, and it's going international.  First we had New York - just a few days, really, after I left, and then DC, Los Angeles, Boston, Chicago, Denver, Cleveland, and Tampa.  Austin, for Christ's sake. 

And I say YES!  I've been for this since right after 9/11 when I went and joined the collective that runs Bound Together (an anarchist bookstore - don't worry, it's the CORRECT political definition of anarchist, which is *not* what you think; people have the wrong idea of the term.  Google it).  I woke up that Tuesday morning (almost exactly 10 years ago, as has been recently mentioned), and my first thought was, "Uh oh, what I've been doing to keep the world sane so far has obviously not been enough. I better get my ass out there and DO something."  I joined the collective two months later, and since have gone on to fight The Man in my own ways, from writing to talking to the little bits of point of view that I slip in while I'm giving lectures at work that are designed to just get people thinking in a slightly different way.

(Insert break here)

I started this entry a few days ago, so it's one of those things where I couldn't quite decide whether I should keep what I already had and try and start in the same vein, OR if I should start all over from someplace else.  But I left it in there, because it shows how quickly the movement has been growing.  And it IS a movement, not a protest - lots of people are getting that wrong.  It's spreading.  Now, there are sites dedicated to the 1% - the people with signs who say that they were trust fund kids, or married into the ruling class, or were raised in private schools and country clubs - whose signs say "I am the 1%...and I stand with the 99%."  I love this idea, and I love the execution.  The nation seems to have inspiring people rising out of it, almost randomly, giving me a little bit of hope, which, as we all know, is essential.

It's funny, because I have a relatively good job - I mean, I understand that America is still, by and large (for all its faults), a very dysfunctional country....not workable, one might say - and I am still squarely in the 99%.  I was thinking the other day about this, and while I don't have the best job in the entire world (I could use a little more time spend NOT working, and it would be cool if it were more artistically inclined), I do have a pretty good one.  I have a better job than most of the people I know, and America (still) has a lot of jobs that are way better than many other countries in the world.  But still, I work FOR someone.  I do not work for myself, and certainly no one works *for* me. 

I recently, however, received two direct reports at work, for the first time - first at this company, and also first since I used to manage Blockbusters in the early 90's.  I've had many indirect reports - lots of managing up, but this is relatively new.  It's part the whole escalation process at work.  I joking posted the other day that my job was like a baby, and when I put it down, it cried.  It's kind of true.

Yet, what can I do?  Part of me wonders what the alternatives are.  I'm definitely learning a lot, and gathering experiences I can't get elsewhere - well, not without paying for them.  We recently moved back into our newly remodeled offices - after being in disjointed temporary quarters for several months - and the new space is lovely: elegant, kind of funky, streamlined, new.  A little bare, yes, but there's a decor plan, so we're into it, we're all getting used to it.  There was a gala on Thursday to celebrate the space - we went all out.  A swing band, rented martini glasses, fantastic prosciutto, and an in-person Feng Shui blessing.  It was all very cool, and it was nice to have been partially personally responsible for it.  I really do care about my office - it's not just my job (well, it IS my job), but it's also become my passion. 

I've been exploring the idea of life/work balance lately - although I never liked the term "life/work" balance, because the opposite of "life" is "death" and this term then suggests that we're not actually ALIVE at work, which of course, is a horrible idea, but one which unfortunately is not unfamiliar to many humans across the ages.  Life has, for many of us, sucked - and many us have spent too long of it doing labor, toil for someone else, some god, some master, some other.

Lest I start to sound too dangerous - I like to say I am a Groucho Marxist (sorry, I can't help it) - let me say, I'm not fixated on that part of it per se.  I don't need to overthrow my company, for goodness' sake!  I'd just like a little bit more free time these days.  I've been being given increased responsibility - and the company is great, they are rewarding me for it in many ways - and I have more power and influence too, but what I have less of is TIME.  Or more accurately, I have more work, and that takes up more time, and I've been struggling lately to figure out how to deal with it.

A co-worker, B, a long-time favorite, said something very telling today.  We have a nice culture, we ask each other how we are doing and answer (mostly) honestly.  It doesn't take too much courage, because we always answer the same way: we are overwhelmed, but oh well, we're here.  "B," I said,"It's just crazy...I don't seem to have time for - "

"Anything but work or essentials?" she smoothly finished.  B can turn a phrase, a quality I think is under appreciated in her.  "Ex-act-ly," I said.  She knew.  The thing is, we all know.  We all have a lot do to - more than we can do, and especially with the holidays coming, which are the golden money days in my business, Thanksgiving in particular - and yet we all keep at it.  We keep at it together, partially because we collectively believe in what we are doing. Why, just today someone made a joke about fellow co-worker "drinking the Kool Aid."  We know we're kind of a cult, but we're not *really.*

So this has been on my mind a lot lately - trying to figure out how to juggle everything, move it all forward, get the work done.  How can I get better at it?  I rack my brains.  Sometimes it wakes me up in the middle of the night, and the option for lessening it hasn't yet materialized.  So what else can I do?  If I can't change the work, maybe I can change the attitude.  I can always change my reaction to it, my perspective about it, right?  These are the areas in which we are taught we can make a difference.

And then I think two phrases I really like which have been coming to mind lately:

"The only way out is through." and "If you're drowning, dive."

The sentiments are the similiar.  You have to keep going.  I like to also think of a Zen saying which is "It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop."  This soothes me a little, and eases some pressure.  Still, there's so much to do, and so I've just lately jumped in.  Lots of events coming up, lots of ideas, lots of - dare I say - love.  Lots of love planned, and we're already saying it's cool.  Not explicitly, but in little ways.  The martini glasses.  The nice space.  The band - yes, I got a few people to get together with me - for the first time, tonight - and play a few songs.  We did fairly well, better than I think we expected.  By the second song, we have some spontanous coordinated dynamics, and we ended together.  I've mentioned before how I like when musicians end together.  It was a lot of fun.  It was certainly more life-affirming than spending more time looking at a computer screen, and while we weren't technically "working," I consider it a form of team building.  Time well spent.

I don't know if this technique of mine is a good long-term solution, but my job, like the rest of life, is ebbs and flows, strikes and gutters, and it's going OK for now.  Because of my job, I have not yet been able to join the Occupy SF, but I plan to.  I'm glad to see it seems like it will be around for a while.  I have a few good 99% signs I want to post.

I saw one which I really liked, which I will close with.

"The people are too big to fail."

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